13. During the male giraffe's brief encounter with the leopard while their pens were near each other, the ostrich had no one to flirt with by making eye contact, so it finally stuck its head in the sand and this is the real story of how the ostrich became so shy and frightened.

Ans. (one of many possible)

During the male giraffe's brief encounter with the leopard while their pens were near each other, the ostrich had no one to flirt with by making eye contact. So it finally stuck its head in the sand, and this is the real story of how the ostrich became so shy and frightened.

The problem here is basically a run-on sentence.

13. During the male giraffe's brief encounter with the leopard while their pens were near each other, the ostrich had no one to flirt with by making eye contact, so it finally stuck its head in the sand and this is the real story of how the ostrich became so shy and frightened.

There are too many conjunctions here. The author has inappropriately connected three independent clauses.

* * * * *

These three independent clauses need to be broken apart. One could break them apart between number 1 and 2 or between number 2 and 3. Or one could write all three as separate stand-alone sentences. However, because the "and this is the real story of how the ostrich became so shy and frightened" seems to be connected to the previous independent clause, the writer of the above answer chooses to connect 2 and 3 and leave 1 as a stand-alone indeendent clause.

[Score 3 pts. for a successful solution that gets rid of the run-on]